©Dil Maange More© More Santa Jokes

Santa: I hav'nt slept all nite in the train.
Banta: Y?
Santa: Got upper berth.
Banta: Y didn't u Xchnge?
Santa: oye, there was nobody 2 Xchnge in the lower   Berth..
 
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Santa tells a girl "Come 2 my house at night, nobody will b there..............
Girl goes at night & really nobody was there
 
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A SANTA went 2 a BANK to open a S.B. A/C.. After seeing the Form he had gone to DELHI for Filling up…………… U knows y?
FORM said "FILL UP IN CAPITAL ".
 
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Santa had twins; he named them Tin & Martin.
Again had twins & named Peter & Repeater.
again twins & named Max & Climax.
Again d same. disgusted Santa named them TIRED & RETIRED!
 
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A Santa photographer focusing a dead body's face in a funeral function, suddenly all relatives beat him why? He said "SMILE PLEASE"
 
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Santaji standing below a tube light with a open mouth.................. WHY?
because his doctor advised him "Todays dinner should be light"_-=
 
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SANTA & FAMILY GO 2 A PARTY. HE INTRODUCES HIMSELF
- I SANTA, SHE SANTANEE, THE BOY MY KID & THE GIRL MY KIDNEE ....
 
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One Santaji professor asked a plumber to come to his college.
U knw Why? Because he wanted to check where the question paper is leaking...
 
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Santa! Your daughter has died!
Depressed, Santa jumps from 100th floor
At 50th floor he remembers I don't have a daughter!
At 25flr: I'm unmarried!
At 10flr: I'm Banta not santa
 
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ON A ROMANTIC DATE SANTAS GIRL FRIEND ASKS HIM,
DARLING ON OUR ENGAGEMENT WILL U GIVE ME A RING?
HE SAID YA SURE ….. WHATS YOUR PHONE NUMBER
 
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Santa found the answer to the most difficult question ever –
What will come first, Chicken or egg?
O Yaar, what ever u order first will come first.
 
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A dog was chasing a Santa and the Santa was laughing.
A bystander: why are u laughing?
Santa: I have a Air cell phone but still hutch network is following me.
 
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A teacher told all students in a class to write an essay on a cricket match.
All were busy writing except one Santaji.
He wrote "DUE TO RAIN, NO MATCH!"
 
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What does a Santa do after taking a xerox?
He will compare it with the original for any spelling mistakes.
 
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WHY CANT SANTAS DIAL NINE-ELEVEN (911) AT EMERGENCY?
** THEY CAN NOT FIND THE ELEVEN ON THE PHONE.
 
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Santa & his wife buy coffee in a shop.
Santa says...
Drink quickly......
Wife asks why...
Santa says hot coffee Rs5 and
cold coffee Rs10
 
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A Santa & his wife filed an application 4 Divorce.
Judge asked: How'll U divide, U"VE 3 children?
Santa replied: Ok! We"ll apply NEXT YEAR
 
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Santa at an Art Gallery: I suppose this horrible looking thing is what you call modern art ?
Art dealer: I beg your pardon sir, thats a mirror!
 
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Santa news: A 2 seater plane crashed in a graveyard in punjab.
Local Santas have so far found 500 bodies and are still digging for more..
 
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Santa visits Chinese friend dying in hospital.
Man says CHIN YU YAN n dies.
Santa goes2 china 2 find meaning of friends last words.
It is 'U R STANDNG ON D OXGN TUBE!"
 
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Santaji was standing in front of the mirror with his eyes closed.
His wife asked what you are doing
He said-im seeing how i look while sleeping.

--
Mohammad Ashraful Amin
Asst. Commissioner and Magistrate
DC Office, Natore
Bangladesh

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